#25

I usually try to keep this blog strictly about my list, and started this entry thinking this would be the exception... but then I came to realize that, in all of my frustration with one friend, I was forgetting about all the GREAT friends I do have. I think I'm finally ready to cross #25 off of my list.

#25- Build a new friendship. This seems like a silly one, I know, but in college, I let my world revolve around my boyfriend instead of meeting new people, and I suffer for it now. Luckily, I came to the realization that only God can fill a hole, or an empty place in my heart, and that I was a moron to pour my energy into someone who could NEVER give me what I need... much less return those efforts. So, #25 was especially important to me because 1) I have a lot of catching up to do, and 2) the friends I have made since I moved back to the Lawrenceville/Snellville area have been such a blessing, that I could only hope to have at least one more person like them in my life.

There has been some on-going drama, not to mention non-reciprocated efforts, with a good friend of mine... well one who I considered a good friend. But in a lot of prayer, tears, and conversations with non-biased parties (:-P), I have come to the realization that maybe it is time to stop trying. That maybe what I hoped for just wasn't going to be the same again...

I found this quote tonight... "Life's not about the people who act true to your face. It's about the people who remain true behind your back." I can appreciate this comment so much because, although I am certainly guilty of gossip (and it's something that I work on), I would never say anything about a friend that I couldn't, or haven't, said to their face. And, unfortunately, I don't feel that this is true with some people who I call my friend. And as I said in the beginning of this blog, in all my depression about this, it didn't dawn on me until I was typing that I have so many NEW friendships to be thankful for, that don't leave me feeling sad or disappointed or not appreciated, and THOSE are the people I want to lift up right now.

Amanda L- although you are not a "new" friend this year, we reached a "new" level this year. I will FOREVER be thankful for the amazing times we had this summer. Summertime Amanda and Summertime Jivey must return in 2010.

Amanda B- I knew from the minute we started Math Institute this summer that you were someone I WANTED to know. I am so thankful to have the "tiny" room across the hall from you because I don't know what I'd do without you sometimes! You are awesome. Can't wait for another WDW and a night of "planning" at your house soon. :)

Sabrina- We've lost touch since the summer a little bit, but I want you to know what an inspiration you are to me, what a Godly woman you are, and how much I just love your heart for those around you. We need some more one-on-one time...

Ana- I am SO proud to call you a friend. You encourage me, you lift me up, and you don't leave me hanging! (haha!) I hope to be that much of an encouragement to you...

Christina- I love that we have so many similarities in our past, which also makes us have so many similarities now, and in our future. I look forward to more hookah nights and girl talks. :)

Melanie, Rachel, Angie, Danyell, Emily, Brittany, and Allison- my small group girls... you give me a reason to look forward to Mondays, and that's a miracle in itself! haha, just kidding. :) But REALLY, you girls are wonderful, and I couldn't ask for a better group of women who want people to see that we are desperate for God. I love you girls, and I'm so glad to get to know each of you.


Hmmm. What is REALLY funny to me is, the list of people who have come into my life since this summer, the ENTIRE list...are women. I used to think I was a guys' girl because I have always hated drama, and girls always seemed to bring it. But that would be the key word... GIRLS. I now know the importance of having good women in your life. My resolution is... I'm not going to dwell anymore on a relationship that does not encourage me, make me feel blessed, or appreciate the efforts I put into it. I will instead pour my energy into and sustain the beautiful NEW friendships I have made this year, and look forward to the ones to come. :)

#25, completed. :)